"I care. I care to the point where impaling you with my claws would hurt me as well.”
The first thing Stiles says after the nogitsune is banished from his body is, “I’m sorry. Oh my god, I’m so fucking sorry.”
His dad wraps him in a hug, presses a kiss to his temple, and harshly whispers, “You’re okay. You’re gonna be okay, kid. I got you.”
Gradually, Stiles makes his rounds. He takes a few days to himself, trying to sort through the mess of memories he has. Asks what’s real, tries to forget the hallucinations the nogitsune showed him.
Quells the nausea when he realizes some of those hallucinations weren’t hallucinations at all.
Scott, Melissa, his dad - hell, everyone he talks to says the same thing when he apologizes.
"Wasn’t your fault, Stiles. It wasn’t you."
It’s three months before Stiles is able to look down at his hands without seeing them covered in Coach’s blood, without seeing them curl over an electrical wire to strip away the covering, without seeing them wrapped around a knife that twists deeper into his brother’s body.
(He cries for almost an hour in Scott’s arms, pressing his hand to Scott’s stomach just to make sure that it’s actually healed even though it’s been months.)
It’s three months before Stiles is able to look down at his hands without remembering the phantom feeling of them wrapping around Derek’s shoulders and throwing him into the wall. It’s three months before he goes to see Derek at all.